Friday 3 June 2016

An Exclusive Interview With A Ravishing Beauty : Part II

Lovelies!

I know I am a forgetful buffoon and it's been several decades since I've updated you regarding my ever eventful life. Let me give you a quick recap, in order of relevance :

My hair is golden again.

I now (for some reason) run a bakery wherein I...well, bake.

I have graduated from 12th grade!

It is true, fellow kiddies. I am done with Physics and Chemistry  but probably not Maths (damn) and Economics (YASS). I will probably go to either Uni of Glasgow or Exeter in two months which means I have only two months to do everything I wanted to do after school, ie go on a roadtrip, learn the guitar, start a vlog, become a millionaire, write a book, become thin and maybe even good looking, you know, your average 18 year old (okay, 17 and nine months) wish list.

Side note, have you noticed how whenever I mention my age on this blog, I am always three months
away from my birthday?

No?

Nobody cares that much?

Cool, me neither.

GETTING TO DA POINT NOW.

So today is the third of June! That lovely time is once again upon us, ladies and gentleboys (I do not know why I say this. My sister says it. I do whatever my sister does. #healthy).
It's the second birthday of my blogggggg! Butterbeer all around!

Do you know what that means?

YESSSS!

Welcome to :

An Exclusive Interview With A Ravishing Beauty : Part II

AK: Hello, and welcome back! I am your exotic host, and today we shall be closely viewing the life of a fellow jobless oaf, namely, AK!
AK: Thankyou, thankyou very much. It is indeed an honour to be back here. I have so much to share-

AK: Okie cool story Anshi. So, are you excited about embarking on your second year, even though you have approximately seven and a half readers left?
AK: *patting eyes with tissue* I sure am. And it's eight and a half. And don't you worry, that did not stop me from mentioning in all my college essays about how I love to write, and even run a moderately successful humour based blog with more than 8,000 views.

AK: Is that true?
AK: Next question.

AK: Tell me about your bakery. I don't really care but it's 11.30 in the afternoon and I clearly have nothing better to do with my time.
AK: Ah, yes. The bakery. It's called "BakeBaby."

AK: Okay.
AK: Do you want to know the story behind it?

AK: Frankly, no. But neither did your college interviewers yesterday, but you still told them, so shoot.
AK: *Nervous laughter with hints of unresolved childhood trauma* So in the national treasure Bridesmaids Kristen Wiig (ie the Goddess) runs a bakery called Cake Baby.

AK: Doesn't she shut that bakery down due to bankrup-
Ak: So I told my sister I'm going to name my bakery Cake Baby. But she came up with the brilliant idea that it should be called Bake Baby. Why, you may ask?

AK: I'm not askin-
AK: Because then when the bakery is really famous, and I have advertisements on TV, after the commercial finishes, a tiny baby voice will whisper "Bake Baby."

AK: ...
AK: ...

AK: *clears throat* I hear you'll be perusing your combined degree from the UK?
AK: I may have to sell both my kidneys, but yes. I will do anything to adopt their accent.

AK: Their...what?
AK: Their education.

AK: Right...And why did you choose both psychology and economics as your majors?
AK: Obviously, for very well thought out reasons. Not because I liked them both and was too lazy to choose one. Yeah, come on AK, it's not like the thought of having two majors is freaking me out okay. It's not like I'm afraid of not understanding psychology since I've, you know, never studied it in my life! Hahahahahaha. Maybe you're afraid. Have you thought about that? Hahahahaha maybe you're the one who's scared of college. Maybe you're the one who fantasizes about being married to Eddie Redmayne.

AK: That is true. We are the same person, you moron.
AK: Can we talk about Eddie Redmayne now?

AK: No.
AK: I love Eddie Redmayne.

AK: I want you to leave now.
AK: Are you going to watch Les Miserables?

AK: Probably.
AK: Ask me one more question. Ask me what my favorite movie is.

AK: Do I have to?
AK: I know you have nothing better to do. I know you're going to go watch Les Miserables - behind the scenes. I know you. I know-

AK: What is your favorite movie?
AK: How does one really choose a favorite? I can give you my top three, and maybe throw in a free autograph but that's all you're getting you cheeky minx-

AK: If you wind this up quickly I will tell you a fun fact about Eddie Redmayne.
AK: 1. The Social Network
       2. Les Miserables
       3. 10 Things I Hate About You

AK: That is really exciting. It is.
AK: Fun fact time!

AK: Fun Fact : Eddie Redmayne is married!
AK: i crie

Thankyou for reading! Thankyou for sticking with Siriusly Riddikuls, seriously ridiculous though it may be! I know I rarely update, and my content may not be that good, but it really keeps me going to see that even two years down the line, there is still somebody reading my silly stuff every single day. I promise to try my best to make you laugh, dear readers, because you guys da best. Love and hugs from Anoushka.

1 comment:

  1. Kiddish yet great stuff... Better than anything I write :D

    ReplyDelete