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Wednesday, 17 December 2014
The Day I Spent All My Money On A Pair Of Gloves That I Did Not Wear Again
Note 1 - I am putting my life as stake even as I write these words since my mother does not know about this wonderful er epic, so I might actually get into (a lot) of trouble if and when she reads this. Three cheers for Kapoorni's never ending heroic deeds!
Note 2 - A lot of people ask me this, and yes, all these stories are true! I'm not exaggerating.
Note 3 - Mommy, if you're reading this, I'm totally kidding. This did not happen.
Okay, so a few days back I attended this badminton tournament, which was part of this annual sports meet thingie let's call it the AST (Annual Sports-Meet Thingie) as part of the school team (which does not actually exist). So anyway, there were five of us, three boys and two girls (talk about an unbalanced sex ratio) in addition to our Tennis Coach who was our escort since we do not have a badminton coach.
Or a badminton court.
But I digress.
Anyway, the Badminton AST was to be held at this school, let's call it The School. So The School is pretty far away from our school, and all six of us plus the driver could not fit into a car, so our coach sent two girls and two boys by car, and he followed us with another student on his bike. He told us to meet him by a coffeehouse, let's call it The Coffehouse (I rock at this naming game, do I not). He told us to wait there, and he would join us in a while.
Now let me just say I'm about the worst person to have along on a road trip of any sort. I am completely clueless when it comes to directions (or, well, anything) so I had no idea where The Coffehouse or The School were, I just listened to my music during the card ride and prayed that the other people would have some clue as to where we were headed. After listening to Bang Bang and All About The Bass approximately twenty five thousand times, we finally arrived in front of The Coffehouse. The car dropped us off and went. We assumed that our coach would be arriving shortly so we just stood outside The Coffehouse in the cold and waited for him.
He took his sweet time. We did everything to pass the minutes. We clicked selfies. We talked. We discussed the probability of winning or losing our upcoming matches. Eventually we got tired of the small talk and just looked around at the neighbouring shops. There were these small roadside shops everywhere selling the typical cheap, horrible quality, second hand goods. I was checking out this particular shop selling gloves and beanies and that sort of thing, when a particularly horrendous item caught my eye.
Okay, so you know those motorcycle gloves (I'm assuming that's what they are called...)? The fingerless ones? The ones that make one look like an ultimate badass? Yeah, those ones. I love them. Always have. I never had my own pair so I just improvised by cutting the finger part off the gloves I already had (something my mother truly loved...not).
So there I was, standing in the cold outside The Coffehouse waiting for the coach to show up, trying to focus on not letting my leg warmers freeze to my shins when I spotted the most lovely (ie ugly) pair of fingerless gloves (they were really ugly I don't know I loved them I don't know what's wrong with me I really don't). It was love at first sight. I asked the shopkeeper how much they were and he quoted a price. I have no experience in bargaining so I had no idea whether this was a reasonable price or not. I consulted my teammates who shook their heads in pity (perhaps at my taste) and got the price much down. They would've gotten it down even further had I not begun to already take the money out of my pocket. Anyway, so I paid and then realised that I had spent all the money I had on me, which had to make me survive for another six hours at least.
But it was worth it. The gloves were amazing.
Except for one thing. They reeked of leather. Not that yummy leather smell that comes from that really awesome shoe shop. No, it reeked of that bad leather smell. The smell that makes you hurl for an entire lifetime. I tried spraying every inch of the gloves with my perfume but it still lingered, so I decided to just the put the darn gloves in my bagpack and wash them the following evening (I think they're still in my bag).
Even after all this, our coach still hadn't shown up, so we decided to just sit inside the warm and toasty coffehouse and treat ourselves to maybe a coffee or two. We sat down, all four of us, and neatly assembled our respective rackets and kits, or math book, in my case. Everyone was doing their own thing. The boys were talking about...whatever it is that boys talk about, and my fellow teammate was listening to her songs, while I was doing maths. I was politely waiting for one of them to order something, since
1) I was famished
2) I didn't have money on me
3) We would be there a long time and The Coffehouse would throw us out if we didn't order anything soon.
I finally addressed the elephant in the room.
"Guys, are we going to order anything or not?"
They looked at me in a quizzical manner. Long story short, I was the only person who had brought along any money, apart from the other boy, who was with our coach. I had spent it all, however, on a pair of leather-reeking gloves, as you well know, hence meaning that none of us had any money.
The minutes passed.
One of the waiters eventually, subtly, slipped a menu on our table.
Wow, subtle as a gun.
I remembered that I did have a ten rupee note in my pocket, and one of the boys had four one rupee coins. Put together, we had fourteen rupees (I'll hold on while you get the calculator to check my math).
We got really excited, and checked the menu. Doughnuts, coffee, ice cream, sundaes, juices, sandwiches..out of our budget. The cookies were fifteen rupees. So close, yet so far. We did spot one thing, however, that was totally in our budget, but it seemed a little impractical to order the add on cheese dip. We were toying with the idea of maybe ordering it, when thankfully the other boy, ie the Boy With The Money finally arrived, and we immediately tackled him and made him order nachos for us.
We looked the waiter straight in the eye as we ordered, as if to say What if we sat here for forty minutes clicking pictures and not ordering anything, we finally did order something, stop judging us, we will tip you!!!!!!!!!
I never thought a box of nachos could regain my lost dignity.
Note 2 - A lot of people ask me this, and yes, all these stories are true! I'm not exaggerating.
Note 3 - Mommy, if you're reading this, I'm totally kidding. This did not happen.
Okay, so a few days back I attended this badminton tournament, which was part of this annual sports meet thingie let's call it the AST (Annual Sports-Meet Thingie) as part of the school team (which does not actually exist). So anyway, there were five of us, three boys and two girls (talk about an unbalanced sex ratio) in addition to our Tennis Coach who was our escort since we do not have a badminton coach.
Or a badminton court.
But I digress.
Anyway, the Badminton AST was to be held at this school, let's call it The School. So The School is pretty far away from our school, and all six of us plus the driver could not fit into a car, so our coach sent two girls and two boys by car, and he followed us with another student on his bike. He told us to meet him by a coffeehouse, let's call it The Coffehouse (I rock at this naming game, do I not). He told us to wait there, and he would join us in a while.
Now let me just say I'm about the worst person to have along on a road trip of any sort. I am completely clueless when it comes to directions (or, well, anything) so I had no idea where The Coffehouse or The School were, I just listened to my music during the card ride and prayed that the other people would have some clue as to where we were headed. After listening to Bang Bang and All About The Bass approximately twenty five thousand times, we finally arrived in front of The Coffehouse. The car dropped us off and went. We assumed that our coach would be arriving shortly so we just stood outside The Coffehouse in the cold and waited for him.
He took his sweet time. We did everything to pass the minutes. We clicked selfies. We talked. We discussed the probability of winning or losing our upcoming matches. Eventually we got tired of the small talk and just looked around at the neighbouring shops. There were these small roadside shops everywhere selling the typical cheap, horrible quality, second hand goods. I was checking out this particular shop selling gloves and beanies and that sort of thing, when a particularly horrendous item caught my eye.
Okay, so you know those motorcycle gloves (I'm assuming that's what they are called...)? The fingerless ones? The ones that make one look like an ultimate badass? Yeah, those ones. I love them. Always have. I never had my own pair so I just improvised by cutting the finger part off the gloves I already had (something my mother truly loved...not).
So there I was, standing in the cold outside The Coffehouse waiting for the coach to show up, trying to focus on not letting my leg warmers freeze to my shins when I spotted the most lovely (ie ugly) pair of fingerless gloves (they were really ugly I don't know I loved them I don't know what's wrong with me I really don't). It was love at first sight. I asked the shopkeeper how much they were and he quoted a price. I have no experience in bargaining so I had no idea whether this was a reasonable price or not. I consulted my teammates who shook their heads in pity (perhaps at my taste) and got the price much down. They would've gotten it down even further had I not begun to already take the money out of my pocket. Anyway, so I paid and then realised that I had spent all the money I had on me, which had to make me survive for another six hours at least.
But it was worth it. The gloves were amazing.
Except for one thing. They reeked of leather. Not that yummy leather smell that comes from that really awesome shoe shop. No, it reeked of that bad leather smell. The smell that makes you hurl for an entire lifetime. I tried spraying every inch of the gloves with my perfume but it still lingered, so I decided to just the put the darn gloves in my bagpack and wash them the following evening (I think they're still in my bag).
Even after all this, our coach still hadn't shown up, so we decided to just sit inside the warm and toasty coffehouse and treat ourselves to maybe a coffee or two. We sat down, all four of us, and neatly assembled our respective rackets and kits, or math book, in my case. Everyone was doing their own thing. The boys were talking about...whatever it is that boys talk about, and my fellow teammate was listening to her songs, while I was doing maths. I was politely waiting for one of them to order something, since
1) I was famished
2) I didn't have money on me
3) We would be there a long time and The Coffehouse would throw us out if we didn't order anything soon.
I finally addressed the elephant in the room.
"Guys, are we going to order anything or not?"
They looked at me in a quizzical manner. Long story short, I was the only person who had brought along any money, apart from the other boy, who was with our coach. I had spent it all, however, on a pair of leather-reeking gloves, as you well know, hence meaning that none of us had any money.
The minutes passed.
One of the waiters eventually, subtly, slipped a menu on our table.
Wow, subtle as a gun.
I remembered that I did have a ten rupee note in my pocket, and one of the boys had four one rupee coins. Put together, we had fourteen rupees (I'll hold on while you get the calculator to check my math).
We got really excited, and checked the menu. Doughnuts, coffee, ice cream, sundaes, juices, sandwiches..out of our budget. The cookies were fifteen rupees. So close, yet so far. We did spot one thing, however, that was totally in our budget, but it seemed a little impractical to order the add on cheese dip. We were toying with the idea of maybe ordering it, when thankfully the other boy, ie the Boy With The Money finally arrived, and we immediately tackled him and made him order nachos for us.
We looked the waiter straight in the eye as we ordered, as if to say What if we sat here for forty minutes clicking pictures and not ordering anything, we finally did order something, stop judging us, we will tip you!!!!!!!!!
I never thought a box of nachos could regain my lost dignity.
Thursday, 27 November 2014
Shitty Tales : Do not read if you don't have a strong stomach
12 hours of my life I'll never get back.
I awoke at 6.40 am today, caught my school bus at 7.20 am, reached the AMC stadium (what does it stand for, I don't know, I've been going there since approximately 45,000 years and I haven't the foggiest idea what it stands for) at 8 am, and reached home at 7.50 pm. I don't know why I need to tell you the exact time of everything. You get the gist. As I mentioned before, I'm part of my school's Student Council. We have our Annual Sports Day (it's our 5th, maybe 6th Sports Day I have no idea how it's annual) tomorrow, at the previously mentioned AMC stadium. We had our run through cum final rehearsal today, for both the Junior and the Senior school, meaning that the Council had to be on duty for almost twelve hours. Wow.
Now, let's make this clear. I want to have seven kids when I grow up. I don't know why, I just do. It'll be cozy. Like the Weasleys' family. (I'm going to name my daughter 'Aziza', a name I read off A Thousand Splendid Suns. I don't know why I'm mentioning all this. I also don't know what I'll name the other six. I'm welcome to all suggestions.) When little kids cry, my heart kind of breaks a little and it makes me cry too. But all in all, I hate kids. I don't know how this makes sense, it just does, okay. Please. So today, we had to look after these tiny, hyperactive kids, and it was...exhausting would be an understatement. I swear to God, these kids didn't tire themselves out for even a single micro second. They were either
1) pooping
2) running
3) crying
4) all of the above, IN EVERY POSSIBLE COMBINATION
I kid you not. There was this one frantic kid who was running around the entire hall crying. It was so traumatizing. But the thing was, he wouldn't stop running. We kept trying to comfort him but he kept running away from us. In the end it resulted in the Crying Kid running around with my boyfriend Jai running behind him trying to catch him, with another teacher running behind him. I would be lying if I said I didn't sort of chuckle (read laugh).
But the highlight of the day was what happened with me. The kids were sitting in two big halls, waiting for their event to start, and to their extreme right were the bathrooms. Hold on, I'll illustrate it for you :
I don't know how little kids think. I think they thought that the bathroom was some sort of a magical disco where wishes were granted and candies handed out. Every single kid was crazy about going to the bloody loo. They lined up, and waited for their turn to come, so that a Prefect could come and guide them (ie unzip/zip up their pants, make sure the little twits...er...darlings didn't get lost on the way back etc). I refused to take even a single kid. But then this really, really, cute boy looked me straight in the eye and said something like "ehhhnnnn bathroom :(" so I had to take him. I took his tiny hand and led him towards the boys loo. I asked him thrice if he knew how to unzip and zip his pants, and thankfully he did. The loos were temporary, and were parted by curtains. Anyway, we reached the boys loo, and this adorable kid did something that has scarred me for not only this life but the next one as well. I have no idea what he was thinking, he headed straight for one of the curtains, and lifted it, and crawled underneath it, hence stepping into straight into some shit.
Some kid's shit.
Some kid's fresh shit.
All the little kids went ewwww and were trying to escape and get away from the Shit Kid, and it made me feel kind of sad for the little guy, but not sad enough to approach him, so I asked someone else to get the kid washed and dried, and I meanwhile took deep breaths to calm myself. I sang the Pokemon theme song under my breath for motivation. I could do this. The kid came back and I offered him a warm, gentle, and loving smile, though I still felt like crying. Our eyes met, but things had changed. I didn't really meet his eye; I sighed and led him back to his hall.
Only this time, I held him by the edge of his collar.
Better to be safe than to be sorry.
I awoke at 6.40 am today, caught my school bus at 7.20 am, reached the AMC stadium (what does it stand for, I don't know, I've been going there since approximately 45,000 years and I haven't the foggiest idea what it stands for) at 8 am, and reached home at 7.50 pm. I don't know why I need to tell you the exact time of everything. You get the gist. As I mentioned before, I'm part of my school's Student Council. We have our Annual Sports Day (it's our 5th, maybe 6th Sports Day I have no idea how it's annual) tomorrow, at the previously mentioned AMC stadium. We had our run through cum final rehearsal today, for both the Junior and the Senior school, meaning that the Council had to be on duty for almost twelve hours. Wow.
Now, let's make this clear. I want to have seven kids when I grow up. I don't know why, I just do. It'll be cozy. Like the Weasleys' family. (I'm going to name my daughter 'Aziza', a name I read off A Thousand Splendid Suns. I don't know why I'm mentioning all this. I also don't know what I'll name the other six. I'm welcome to all suggestions.) When little kids cry, my heart kind of breaks a little and it makes me cry too. But all in all, I hate kids. I don't know how this makes sense, it just does, okay. Please. So today, we had to look after these tiny, hyperactive kids, and it was...exhausting would be an understatement. I swear to God, these kids didn't tire themselves out for even a single micro second. They were either
1) pooping
2) running
3) crying
4) all of the above, IN EVERY POSSIBLE COMBINATION
I kid you not. There was this one frantic kid who was running around the entire hall crying. It was so traumatizing. But the thing was, he wouldn't stop running. We kept trying to comfort him but he kept running away from us. In the end it resulted in the Crying Kid running around with my boyfriend Jai running behind him trying to catch him, with another teacher running behind him. I would be lying if I said I didn't sort of chuckle (read laugh).
But the highlight of the day was what happened with me. The kids were sitting in two big halls, waiting for their event to start, and to their extreme right were the bathrooms. Hold on, I'll illustrate it for you :
I don't know how little kids think. I think they thought that the bathroom was some sort of a magical disco where wishes were granted and candies handed out. Every single kid was crazy about going to the bloody loo. They lined up, and waited for their turn to come, so that a Prefect could come and guide them (ie unzip/zip up their pants, make sure the little twits...er...darlings didn't get lost on the way back etc). I refused to take even a single kid. But then this really, really, cute boy looked me straight in the eye and said something like "ehhhnnnn bathroom :(" so I had to take him. I took his tiny hand and led him towards the boys loo. I asked him thrice if he knew how to unzip and zip his pants, and thankfully he did. The loos were temporary, and were parted by curtains. Anyway, we reached the boys loo, and this adorable kid did something that has scarred me for not only this life but the next one as well. I have no idea what he was thinking, he headed straight for one of the curtains, and lifted it, and crawled underneath it, hence stepping into straight into some shit.
Some kid's shit.
Some kid's fresh shit.
All the little kids went ewwww and were trying to escape and get away from the Shit Kid, and it made me feel kind of sad for the little guy, but not sad enough to approach him, so I asked someone else to get the kid washed and dried, and I meanwhile took deep breaths to calm myself. I sang the Pokemon theme song under my breath for motivation. I could do this. The kid came back and I offered him a warm, gentle, and loving smile, though I still felt like crying. Our eyes met, but things had changed. I didn't really meet his eye; I sighed and led him back to his hall.
Only this time, I held him by the edge of his collar.
Better to be safe than to be sorry.
Sunday, 26 October 2014
30 Sexy Pin Up Fringe Girl Hairstyles
Esteemed chums and chumettes.
I never ever thought that I'd feel sleepy at 9.34 pm. Wow. This when my day usually stars; by the time I'm finally done with my studies and my important time-wasting activities.
The thing is, today was (my first ever) MUN. Hurrah!
For those of you who don't know, MUN stands basically for a Model United Nations. An-
One day later.
An? I have no idea. The point of everything is that the MUN was AWESOME. I was in the MOM (Ministry Of Magic) Committee, and our agenda was debate over resurrection of the Dark Lord, post the events of the Triwizard Tournament. I was originally Bertha Jorkins, then Albert Runcorn, and ultimately I was Rita Skeeter (long story). It was brilliant, and I got a verbal mention. (I thought that was the same as a special mention and ran up to the stage to collect my award, only to realize that a verbal mention is...well.. a verbal mention,)
We had a DJ party after that, and for those of you who know and care (i.e. none) I'm a terrible dancer, so naturally, it was a hoot. I may never be able to walk again though, but that's a different story.
Ten days later
Good Evening to one and all. I am once again back to my usual, insomniac self. It is one in the morning, so naturally, I'm blogging because
(a) My pink-and-silver nails make a very pretty tapping noise against the keyboard
(b) Isn't the first reason good enough?
Technically today is Sunday, but if I put up a Sunday post after a long absence, people start stuff like Stop with the negativity and then I have to curl up with my dog and feel sorry for myself for a very long time (Just kidding, I appreciate criticism. Ish. Hahahahaha. No, I really do. As much as I appreciate double Physics classes. HAHAHAHAHAHAH okay seriously. I do though.).
Anyway, day before was Diwali, ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Diwali if you're lost) which means of course like every Diwali, the following happened -
1. I threw approximately 45,000 tantrums because it was a bad hair day (i.e. a normal day for Kapoorni)
2. I bought a toy gun and broke and/or misplaced it within fifteen minutes
3. I burned my hand(s)
It was still fun because I love festive times since it's an excuse to drink all the soft drinks my mother keeps in the fridge for guests who might visit (who ultimately have to have carrot juice).
In other news, I started reading my mother's favourite book Gone With The Wind but the protagonist in the book has a seventeen inch waist and that just makes me feel bad about myself, so I decided to use this as positive motivation and work hard to become thin and dainty like Scarlett O'Hara.
LOL, no, I felt bad for a little while, then had some chocolate cookies and read Charlie and the Chocolate Factory instead.
Honestly though I really do need to start working out soon since my badminton time usually gets eaten up by study-time. I secretly google things like how to get abs in three days and how to get complexion like Emma Stone but after reading all the wikihow insturctions, I just give up and have another glass/bit of pepsi/chocolate(s).
Note 1 - All this googling has to be done in secret since I once googled a very, very embarrassing thing, and even today whenever I type 30... in the search box, it always comes up. I am not going to tell you what it is. It's very sad.
Note 2 - Oh, alright. It was 30 Sexy Pin Up Fringe Girl Hairstyles
I never ever thought that I'd feel sleepy at 9.34 pm. Wow. This when my day usually stars; by the time I'm finally done with my studies and my important time-wasting activities.
The thing is, today was (my first ever) MUN. Hurrah!
For those of you who don't know, MUN stands basically for a Model United Nations. An-
One day later.
An? I have no idea. The point of everything is that the MUN was AWESOME. I was in the MOM (Ministry Of Magic) Committee, and our agenda was debate over resurrection of the Dark Lord, post the events of the Triwizard Tournament. I was originally Bertha Jorkins, then Albert Runcorn, and ultimately I was Rita Skeeter (long story). It was brilliant, and I got a verbal mention. (I thought that was the same as a special mention and ran up to the stage to collect my award, only to realize that a verbal mention is...well.. a verbal mention,)
We had a DJ party after that, and for those of you who know and care (i.e. none) I'm a terrible dancer, so naturally, it was a hoot. I may never be able to walk again though, but that's a different story.
Ten days later
Good Evening to one and all. I am once again back to my usual, insomniac self. It is one in the morning, so naturally, I'm blogging because
(a) My pink-and-silver nails make a very pretty tapping noise against the keyboard
(b) Isn't the first reason good enough?
Technically today is Sunday, but if I put up a Sunday post after a long absence, people start stuff like Stop with the negativity and then I have to curl up with my dog and feel sorry for myself for a very long time (Just kidding, I appreciate criticism. Ish. Hahahahaha. No, I really do. As much as I appreciate double Physics classes. HAHAHAHAHAHAH okay seriously. I do though.).
Anyway, day before was Diwali, ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Diwali if you're lost) which means of course like every Diwali, the following happened -
1. I threw approximately 45,000 tantrums because it was a bad hair day (i.e. a normal day for Kapoorni)
2. I bought a toy gun and broke and/or misplaced it within fifteen minutes
3. I burned my hand(s)
It was still fun because I love festive times since it's an excuse to drink all the soft drinks my mother keeps in the fridge for guests who might visit (who ultimately have to have carrot juice).
In other news, I started reading my mother's favourite book Gone With The Wind but the protagonist in the book has a seventeen inch waist and that just makes me feel bad about myself, so I decided to use this as positive motivation and work hard to become thin and dainty like Scarlett O'Hara.
LOL, no, I felt bad for a little while, then had some chocolate cookies and read Charlie and the Chocolate Factory instead.
Honestly though I really do need to start working out soon since my badminton time usually gets eaten up by study-time. I secretly google things like how to get abs in three days and how to get complexion like Emma Stone but after reading all the wikihow insturctions, I just give up and have another glass/bit of pepsi/chocolate(s).
Note 1 - All this googling has to be done in secret since I once googled a very, very embarrassing thing, and even today whenever I type 30... in the search box, it always comes up. I am not going to tell you what it is. It's very sad.
Note 2 - Oh, alright. It was 30 Sexy Pin Up Fringe Girl Hairstyles
Tuesday, 30 September 2014
Too Many Rulers Spoil The...Whatever
The only difference between having and not having an exam the next day is that you can do random stuff during the latter and not feel guilty about it. My point (somehow) is that my exams are over!
Anyway, I'm supposed to be working for the MUN I'm attending in two weeks, so of course I'm watching How I Met Your Mother bloopers at the moment.
Also, also, ALSO, a few weeks ago, my blog crossed 4,100 views! If you're reading this, you're awesome. If you're not reading this..well..you're still awesome. But read too. It's fun(ish).
I was going to though my drafts yesterday, and I discovered an entire post I'd never gotten around to posting, so here is something I wrote about a month ago -
One Month Earlier
It is currently 6.05 am. I have a football match in an hour and twenty five minutes. I'm sitting here, looking down at my yellow and blue flowered shorts, wondering if I should pack an extra pair if these tear.
Good thinking.
I'll pack two extra pairs. Maybe three. Ooh, maybe those cute pink ones.
Thirteen hours and one football match later
I managed to not tear my shorts! Hurrah! Butterbeer all around! Also, we won the match! I thought I would drop dead halfway through the match, but I somehow (miraculously) managed to stay alive. I may never be able to move again though. (Funny story, we ended up winning all the matches!)
Anyway, I have my Chemistry test tomorrow, meaning of course I'm completely hyper and anxious right now, like I am before every damn test. Ah, Keeping Your Cool 101 not brought to you by Kapoorni. (This is the one in which I managed to get everything right except for one damn numerical, and I would've gotten that right too had KFH not traumatised me with his superpowers of flying spit mere hours before the test.)
The point (kind of) is this, that it made remember a story from my 10th grade Physics final.
It was a warm day in February. Wait, March? I'm not sure. In fact I think it was winter time, and it was a cold day. Okay, scratch that. It was a coldish day in February or maybe March. I was studying for my Physics final the next day, when I remembered that I did not have a ruler, which I would almost definitely be needing the next day (spoiler alert - I wouldn't). Anyway, I called up Izzy, and asked her if she would be kind enough to lend me a ruler perhaps? Izzy said that she did not have a ruler either, but she had a protractor, which is of course, not even nearly the same thing, but I substitute just about anything for a ruler, (my badge, a bookmark, my finger) so I said that it would do. Izzy promised to leave it out for me, and I could come collect it in the morning.
I have the remembering capacity of Dory from finding Nemo, (ie none) so being the lovable fool that I am, I called up Marshmallow too, and told her to bring an extra ruler for me in the bus, which she said she would.
Come the next morning, my mother went to fetch the protractor from Izzy's house, but returned instead with a set square. (What.) Beggar can't be choosers, so I told my mother that the set square would do. Besides, I had managed to fish out an old ruler and a protractor from my own bag.
Counting - A Test
How many rulers/substitutes did I have by now?
Two rulers, one was mine, one was Marshmallow's, a protractor (mine) and Izzy's setsquare
Okay, you follow that? If you do, give yourself a pat on the back.
Anyway, the next morning, I was sitting in the bus, slightly bewildered by all my rulers/substitutes, trying to do some last minute revision, when our bus stopped suddenly a few feet away from the local market. One of the conductors got down and ran towards a stationary shop, from where I frequently got stuff. I looked at my watch and frowned. Some idiot kid had probably forgotten some stationary and we were being to made to suffer. Why can't students be more responsible?
I shook my head and asked the driver what was wrong. He threw me a dirty look but before I could ask him what was wrong (we were the best of friends, he had once told me a very long story about some animal, or maybe his kid, I couldn't really understand but I nodded and smiled all the same, so such cold behaviour was towards me was rare), the conductor came back, carrying with him a very long ruler and a normal sized ruler, both freshly bought. He stopped for breath and came and stood in front of me.
I look astonished. Surely, surely these were not for me? How did the conductor even know that I needed them? Had the ruler-goddess descended down to Earth? Had the conductor read my mind? Just as I was going to ask him whether he was a Legilimens, he explained to me that my mother had called the driver up this morning and explained my apparent ruler-less situation to him.
I hate it when she does this, she often forgets the social boundaries one has to maintain with one's school bus driver, and she often crosses it. I have often woken up from nightmares including her and driver having long conversations on the phone, but no one understands my pains.
So, anyway that is how I wound up with four rulers, a protractor, and one set square, out of which I used none.
The End.
Anyway, I'm supposed to be working for the MUN I'm attending in two weeks, so of course I'm watching How I Met Your Mother bloopers at the moment.
Also, also, ALSO, a few weeks ago, my blog crossed 4,100 views! If you're reading this, you're awesome. If you're not reading this..well..you're still awesome. But read too. It's fun(ish).
I was going to though my drafts yesterday, and I discovered an entire post I'd never gotten around to posting, so here is something I wrote about a month ago -
One Month Earlier
It is currently 6.05 am. I have a football match in an hour and twenty five minutes. I'm sitting here, looking down at my yellow and blue flowered shorts, wondering if I should pack an extra pair if these tear.
Good thinking.
I'll pack two extra pairs. Maybe three. Ooh, maybe those cute pink ones.
Thirteen hours and one football match later
I managed to not tear my shorts! Hurrah! Butterbeer all around! Also, we won the match! I thought I would drop dead halfway through the match, but I somehow (miraculously) managed to stay alive. I may never be able to move again though. (Funny story, we ended up winning all the matches!)
Anyway, I have my Chemistry test tomorrow, meaning of course I'm completely hyper and anxious right now, like I am before every damn test. Ah, Keeping Your Cool 101 not brought to you by Kapoorni. (This is the one in which I managed to get everything right except for one damn numerical, and I would've gotten that right too had KFH not traumatised me with his superpowers of flying spit mere hours before the test.)
The point (kind of) is this, that it made remember a story from my 10th grade Physics final.
It was a warm day in February. Wait, March? I'm not sure. In fact I think it was winter time, and it was a cold day. Okay, scratch that. It was a coldish day in February or maybe March. I was studying for my Physics final the next day, when I remembered that I did not have a ruler, which I would almost definitely be needing the next day (spoiler alert - I wouldn't). Anyway, I called up Izzy, and asked her if she would be kind enough to lend me a ruler perhaps? Izzy said that she did not have a ruler either, but she had a protractor, which is of course, not even nearly the same thing, but I substitute just about anything for a ruler, (my badge, a bookmark, my finger) so I said that it would do. Izzy promised to leave it out for me, and I could come collect it in the morning.
I have the remembering capacity of Dory from finding Nemo, (ie none) so being the lovable fool that I am, I called up Marshmallow too, and told her to bring an extra ruler for me in the bus, which she said she would.
Come the next morning, my mother went to fetch the protractor from Izzy's house, but returned instead with a set square. (What.) Beggar can't be choosers, so I told my mother that the set square would do. Besides, I had managed to fish out an old ruler and a protractor from my own bag.
Counting - A Test
How many rulers/substitutes did I have by now?
Two rulers, one was mine, one was Marshmallow's, a protractor (mine) and Izzy's setsquare
Okay, you follow that? If you do, give yourself a pat on the back.
Anyway, the next morning, I was sitting in the bus, slightly bewildered by all my rulers/substitutes, trying to do some last minute revision, when our bus stopped suddenly a few feet away from the local market. One of the conductors got down and ran towards a stationary shop, from where I frequently got stuff. I looked at my watch and frowned. Some idiot kid had probably forgotten some stationary and we were being to made to suffer. Why can't students be more responsible?
I shook my head and asked the driver what was wrong. He threw me a dirty look but before I could ask him what was wrong (we were the best of friends, he had once told me a very long story about some animal, or maybe his kid, I couldn't really understand but I nodded and smiled all the same, so such cold behaviour was towards me was rare), the conductor came back, carrying with him a very long ruler and a normal sized ruler, both freshly bought. He stopped for breath and came and stood in front of me.
I look astonished. Surely, surely these were not for me? How did the conductor even know that I needed them? Had the ruler-goddess descended down to Earth? Had the conductor read my mind? Just as I was going to ask him whether he was a Legilimens, he explained to me that my mother had called the driver up this morning and explained my apparent ruler-less situation to him.
I hate it when she does this, she often forgets the social boundaries one has to maintain with one's school bus driver, and she often crosses it. I have often woken up from nightmares including her and driver having long conversations on the phone, but no one understands my pains.
So, anyway that is how I wound up with four rulers, a protractor, and one set square, out of which I used none.
The End.
Thursday, 25 September 2014
Barcelona Diaries Minus The Barcelona Bit
Chums and
chumettes! It is currently..well..I have no idea what time it is. I am
currently on a flight from Zurich to Barcelona. According to the screen in
front of me, I am 350 miles away from my desired destination. Time till
destination is 51 minutes.
Glad we
sorted that out.
Anyway, since
morning I’ve had a buttered bun, a glass of coke, a double cheese burger with a
coke, half of a footlong sandwhich with a glass of coke, and I just had a salami (maybe it was ham?)
and cheese sandwich. With of course, a glass of coke. The point is this; I have
a bottomless pit for a stomach.
Anyway we’re
flying over some mountains right now, not sure which, Geography was never my
strong suit, and it looks really pretty.
I’m kind of
bummed that I won’t get to celebrate my birthday (in four days time) at home,
but then I think about the possibility of running into David De Gea in the
streets of Barcelona and it calms me down.
Hold on.
They’re handing out those little chocolates on board. (I had specially taken a picture of the chocolate and I was all Imma be the best blogger ever with pictures and all yayayayay but I lost my memory card)
Yum yum yum.
Nothing much
to write about now. The only unusual incident that has happened in the past
couple of hours is that I have gone more than 12 hours without using any wifi,
which is a very big achievement. Not just for me. For humanity.
Okay. I’m
going to watch Mean Girls now.
Two Days Later
Today was so
exhausting. We hopped on this hop on hop off bus, with those little guided audio
tours, where you put on those headphones and a British lady’s voice tells you
everything about the city - and I’m telling you, if I EVER have to hear that guide’s voice again, I’ll scream. And
possibly hit her.
At every damn stop, she reminded us that we
could refund our 20% off discount coupon at the nearest shops. I became so
annoyed with the tour, I watched 500 days
of summer instead of listening to the tour. As my father rightly said, “I don’t know my own city as well as I know
about Barcelona’s discount copouns.”
Touché, sir.
Touché.
A month later
A MONTH has it really been that long?! I know, I know, I was all oh my God I'm going to post fifty times a day now I'll never ever disappear again teehee and then I vanished for an entire month. I don't even know if I have any readers left by now, but if you're reading, I love you, and I'm not even kidding.
Anyway, I couldn't post because I had to, well, study what with being in the 11th grade and all that nonsense. Exams really are rather inconvenient, disturbing my blogging and what not. Anyway I have just two more exams left, and one of them is English, so I'm sort of practicing writing, eh? Okay, I'll keep telling myself that.
THE POINT IS THAT the following has happened in the past few weeks
- I went to Spain
- I came back from Spain
- I turned 16 in between all that
- Sims 3 has been replaced by Zoo Tycoon 2. Life = Bliss.
I thought that I'd write a little bit about my trip everyday, and then compile it all at the ending with all the pictures I had taken but that plan failed because
(a) I forgot to write
(b) I forgot to take pictures
Ah, obstacles. How I hate them. Anyway it's one thirty in the morning right now and my room is colder than Antarctica, and I'm unwell also, because after sleeping for about 3 hours before my Economics exam, I came home and (instead of sleeping) watched The Fault In Our Stars so naturally I had a splitting headache from crying, and then instead of sleeping I put on approximately 45-inches heels and went for Tall-y's birthday party, and by the time I came back I was, well, dead-ish.
Anyway this was a pretty random and nonsensical post, but I just wanted to say I'm back for good, and even if I might disappear for a few days (to study The Subject of Doom-ness, also known as Physics by some) I'll post for sure on the 29th, if not before.
Thankyou for taking the time out to read this!
Much love,
Kapoorni.
Monday, 25 August 2014
KFH - A comic
Good evening boys and girls and ladies and gentlemen and frogs and herbs.
Wait. What.
I know that I have not written anything for more than a week, but you must keep in mind that I'm a forgetful buffoon and making commitments is a very big challenge for me. I find it difficult to stick to things, which is why I can never have a favourite song, or a book, for more than a week. Or even a favourite colour. (Currently it is navy blue. Keep that in mind.)
(Quick, unrelated note - My blog hit more than 3,500 views a few weeks ago! Butterbeer all around! Also, FOLLOW the blog. SUBSCRIBE to it. I will love you for it.)
Anyway, I shall now be regular in my posts, and blog on like a good blogress.
![]()
Wait. What.
I know that I have not written anything for more than a week, but you must keep in mind that I'm a forgetful buffoon and making commitments is a very big challenge for me. I find it difficult to stick to things, which is why I can never have a favourite song, or a book, for more than a week. Or even a favourite colour. (Currently it is navy blue. Keep that in mind.)
(Quick, unrelated note - My blog hit more than 3,500 views a few weeks ago! Butterbeer all around! Also, FOLLOW the blog. SUBSCRIBE to it. I will love you for it.)
Anyway, I shall now be regular in my posts, and blog on like a good blogress.
Hehehe. Moving on.
I have missed approximately a gazillion days of school, because I went to visit my sister at her college, and I shall miss another gazillion days next week, when I leave for Spain. The point of this is that I feel pretty disconnected with a lot of my classmates, which, as you would rightly guess, sucks. However, there are certain people I'm glad I haven't met in a lot of days.
Like this kid. In my bus.
I hate that kid. I like to believe that he was put on the Earth to make life difficult for me. Let me illustrate via an accurately drawn comic strip.
Wild kid appears out of nowhere. Kid wasn't in my bus yesterday, and he suddenly apparates out of thin air. Why/how? I'm still busy learning the Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle, while simultaneously trying to figure out when this random kid got on my bus, when I hear a terrible noise. What could it possibly be? I realize it is coming from the Kid From Hell. (KFH)
KFH starts singing this song, called I'm a disco dancer at the top of his voice. He's not even singing the correct tune. He's just saying the words loudly to whatever tune he wants. Excellent. I stare at him aghast. Surely this isn't normal behaviour? I was so cute and innocent as a kid. I just ate mud occasionally and went for nature walks with Izzy to find fairies and that sort of stuff. Why was this crazy kid singing so loudly into my ear?
But aha, the crazy behavior does not end there. Everybody has a super power, right? Mine is obviously, being careless and procrastinating. KFH had one too. What was it? What could it be? I found out the hard way.
This is what I, as a rational person, said -
This is what KFH did -
Kid starts frothing at the mouth, and I freak out. Does the kid have rabies or something? Shit, what the hell do I do know? Why did I drop Bio? What the hell was I supposed to do why was this kid frothing at the mouth omgomgogmogm.
Suddenly, all my prayers were answered. I put two and two together. I realized what was happening next.
Basically, the kid spat on me. To make a long story short. That's what he does everyday. He sings loudly, when we tell him to shut up, he starts getting ready to spit on us, and we run away from him in fear.
(This is not the first time I got bullied by a kid three heads shorter than me. A year ago, there was this kid who used to routinely hit me and/or bite me in the bus. I like to believe that he is related to KFH in ways more than one.)
To sum up,
The End.
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